Fairly Odd Kids

Raising G-rated kids in a PG-13 world

October 6, 2012

The other day, I heard a radio caller who had just won two tickets to a Justin Bieber concert. “Oh! My daughter is going to be so excited!” she exclaimed.

“That’s great! How old is your daughter?” asked the DJ.

“She’s five!”

I groaned. Five?!? OK, I’ll admit we are not Justin Bieber fans. And while I think he’s a gazillion times less offensive than, say, Chris Brown, aren’t there more, er, age-appropriate bands for five-year-olds? (Wait! I know the answer to this question!) Does she really plan to drag her five year old to a concert? (This is me being judge-y, I know. Sorry.)

A day or two later, I read this piece by fellow kindie music critic and all-around good guy, Jeff Bogle, in which he slammed parents in his area for exposing young kids to older-person music and movies before their time. This has lead to a rash of grade schoolers in his daughter’s classroom using words like “hot” and “sexy” in the classroom. And not as in “wow, it’s hot outside“, but as in “he’s really hot” and “she’s really sexy.” Gag. While I’m not convinced they really have any idea what they mean, I still gag.

So while I read his angry rant, I shook my head in agreement. . .until he got to this: Your 8-year-olds DO NOT need to, by nature of the time in which we are living, sound like a fucking pimp, in school or out. Make no mistake about it, you will regret not doing more to prevent this, and I sincerely hope your children grow to resent you for not working more diligently on their behalf, for not allowing them to revel longer in the blissfulness of their youth.

Oh. Eight year olds? That’s the age he’s talking about?

Shoot. Time to step down off my high-and-mighty horse.

Because as much as I’d like to say that my homeschooled children have grown up listening to age-appropriate tunes and classical music their entire lives, that isn’t really all that accurate. And when it comes to my youngest (my eight year old), he has definitely been exposed to more than his two older sisters were at his age.

From the moment he could watch TV, D. was watching what his older sisters were watching. Granted, they were only 6 and 4 when he was 2, but still—no Teletubbies for this kid. No Dora, no Sesame Street, no Mickey Mouse, especially when he was five, six, seven and, now, eight. He could pick out Victoria Justice before The Count in a lineup.

And while he still listens to some kids’ music, he proclaims he is “too old” for most of the CD’s I try to share, preferring instead the pop music of his 11-year-old sister. And last year, (at the tender age of seven) that meant that he loved—and I mean LOVED—this song. He loved it enough to sing it loudly wherever we were. My only hope was that his speech difficulties made it hard for other people to understand what he was saying. I’m sure we got the hairy eyeball from at least a few parents. (Though is this song any different than that iconic Right Said Fred song every 90’s kid knew by heart?)

I get what Jeff is saying, though, and try to limit some things that bother me most. We have the cable networks locked down so much that my oldest cries foul every time she tries to watch Cartoon Network. She gets upset that she can’t go onto YouTube to see the funny videos her friends share, or visit a website that hasn’t had prior parental approval. She was p-i-s-s-e-d last night when I told her she can’t start her own Blogger site without a long list of guidelines and privacy settings..

But, she’s going on twelve. So, I give her some slack. Which means that, since the other two are with her almost every day, they get some slack too. I don’t change radio stations as quickly as I used to and let her listen to a lot of the pop music her friends hear. All three kids curl up to watch a PG movie I never would have let my oldest see at the age my son is now. And when she wants to play Hunger Games (a book I only recently let her read) in the yard with her older friends, I let the younger ones play along too.

It’s a tricky dance, I know. Though it’s made me think about how much more my youngest has been exposed to compared to his older sister was.

It also made me think: Maybe that radio mama with a five year old who is into Justin Bieber also has teens who have his posters all over their rooms and sing his songs as they get ready for school. Or cousins who play the music whenever they are together. Or a bus driver who blasts the tunes on the bus (as is the case in our neighborhood).

I’m not sure how you keep these words and songs completely away from kids, though I’m with Jeff on this: When I saw two wee little girls, maybe four or five years old, standing in the Barbie aisle at Target and saw one of them point at a boy doll and say, emphatically, “he’s HOT” (while the mother smiled down at them), I thought, “Ick“. Really, ick.

Though, in hindsight, my son was probably two aisles away, looking at the LEGO sets and singing, “I’m sexy and I know it” under his breath.

Filed Under: Fairly Odd Kids, Fairly Odd Me, Uncategorized 8 Comments

Ten Nice Things

September 12, 2012

Last night, as I was about to take our dog Star out for her evening walk, I heard screams from the second floor. The kind of screams that can mean only one thing: The girls had hit each other.

I hate when the kids hit each other. Scream your heads off. Call each other names. Stomp down the stairs to tell me the litany of sins the other has done. Just do not kick, punch, squeeze, pinch, or slap the other person.

I ended up yelling quite a bit in frustration over this and then sent each girl to different rooms while I took the dog out on her walk (with the warning that if they fought while I was out, they’d have to get dressed and walk the dog with me, in the cold dark, every winter night.)

Then I had an idea that I’m sure was planted by someone else (was it you?). Instead of yelling more, or taking away privileges, or just sweeping the whole thing under the rug, the girls would have to do something nice for each other.

Ten nice things, in fact.

So this morning when they staggered down the stairs, I told them the plan: No electronics. No early morning TV, no checking email, using your iPod, reading your Kindle. . .nothing. . .until you’ve each done 10 nice things for the other person. Write down each item and I will okay them one by one.

Belly was first. She made Jilly’s bed, picked up the beads she spilled the night before, straightened out her dolls, hung up her coat. Her list of ten was done in under a half hour.

Jilly is working on her list right now. So far, she’s made her sister’s bed, plug her sister’s iPod into its charger for her, and straightened all the books out that are next to her bed.

I’m not sure what this will accomplish except that it feels kind of nice to have them thinking about what they can do for each other, instead of how pissed off they are after last night.

And I’m glad that someone else is making the beds.

Filed Under: Fairly Odd Kids, Fairly Odd Me 8 Comments

25 reasons we’ll return to Mount Desert Island

August 29, 2012

1. The views! Every! Where! You! Look! Gorgeousness everywhere.

Day’s end in Southwest Harbor

2. $40 for an annual pass to Acadia National Park gives us a good reason to go back next summer.

3. Camping at Blackwoods Campground: big wooded lots, clean(ish) bathrooms, and so quiet in the middle of the night, I could hear the ocean roaring in the distance.

Yes, our tent. Yes, we are outgrowing it.

4. Lobster so fresh at Beal’s in Southwest Harbor, it was swimming that morning.

Before and after

5. Hikes for all abilities, even a scaredy cat like me. Though I will never ever do Beehive or Precipice. Going up the metal ladders on Beech Cliffs hike was about as radical as I’m every going to get.

I climbed this high!

6. Biking on carriage roads is the bomb. It’s especially cool when your 9 year old goes whizzing by on the downhill and disappears from view for a good long time.

The blond will be FAR ahead pretty soon.

7. 2 Cats for breakfast. Orange juice is fresh-squeezed, and the food is delish.

nom, nom, nom

8. Dive-in Theater with Diver Ed Boat Cruise. Laughed so much during this two-hour tour. It was hilarious, fun, interesting, and informative. The kids were glued to every word Diver Ed and his wife, Captain Evil, had to say. Worth every last penny.

My little Sea Cucumber lover

9. Popovers at Jordan Pond House Restaurant. As good as everyone says they are. Especially if you bike to the restaurant.

10. So, so, so clean. I never wished I had a garbage bag with me to pick up the trash I found on our walks.

11. I’ll make GORP again.

You know you want some.

12. Stars over Sand Beach. Lying on a blanket on a sandy beach nestled between rocks, gazing up at the amazing Maine summer night sky, having the constellations pointed out by a park ranger. . . so very relaxing and cool. Next time, I had better see one of the shooting stars everyone else saw, though we all got to wave to the International Space Station.

13. Swimming in Echo Lake. Warm(ish) fresh water with sandy bottom felt great after a long hike. Plus, we could look up to the mountain on one side and say, “we were up there!”

Echo Lake. Too many people to test the name.

14. Maybe I’ll touch Bubble Rock next time. Or, maybe I’ll just sit way over here again.

So. High. Up. (gulp)

15. The Boobles. One local told us to look for the two Bubble mountains by looking for the two that look like breasts. From then on, we called them The Boobles.

The Boobles. Heh, get it? BOOBles?

16. No internet service for the majority of our trip meant no fighting over iPads or video games, and no staring at screens. But, when we were jonesing for some Wifi, there were options, like this retro-funky coffee shop in town.